How Writing A Made-Up Story Helped Me Overcome Responsibility OCD

Updated: Jul 12, 2021

I conflict. Am I the irresponsible person OCD tells me I am, or is it a self-made belief? It's like OCD is the author of an obsessional story within me, but I write the script. In other words, I'm the one who creates an anxiety-provoking narrative filled with assumptions from the doubts linked to OCD's triggering thoughts about causing a fire. And it's me who lets OCD think it's doing me a favour. That is by doing safety rituals in exchange for more of its risk-avoidance alerts. Put simply, I inadvertently give it the message that my compulsions prevent me from becoming what it tells me I am. In that case, it expects the same endless reciprocation day in, day out. But I'm tired of its "guarded" reminders and feeling urged to do the corresponding risk-avoidance behaviours. Still, I'm the one who can stop the conflict by removing inferences that build the story, quieting the intrusive voice. And I'm the one who can confront the fear it brings and resist the rituals. In doing so, I can develop a tolerance for anxiety and break this cyclic exchange.

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